Waiting
by shikigami-kun
Summary: Vignette - A moment during the 6-7 episodes, while they're waiting for Sanzo to recover. (mostly 58) PLEASE Read and Review! I would really, really appreciate it! :D


Title: Waiting

Author: dorei no ryu/arldetta

Disclaimers: Saiyuki belongs to the wonderful Kazuya Minekura, Enix, and Zero Sum. I'm content just borrowing them now and then. ;)

Summary: A moment that takes place while waiting for Sanzo to recover during the Rikudo incident. 58.

Author's note: Well, this is my first attempt at Yaoi romance. Actually, I'm not much for romance one way or another. But I thought it might be good to try something different and this little scene kept bothering me, so I finally decided to just sit down and write it. Please read and review!! I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you!!! :D

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Carefully he opened the door while maintaining his hold on the small tray he brought. No lights were on, as he left it, and only a thin shaft of light penetrated the darkness between the curtains. It was just enough illumination to make out the simple interior of the room and cast shadows on the sleeping figure. He gingerly walked over to the table to place down the tray and then went to stand next to the bed.

For some moments, the once human admired the scene before him. Over the past few years he had grown to love this visage, even if he felt unworthy of felling that emotion again. About a month ago they had set out on this epic journey to stop the resurrection of Gyumaoh. It was assumed that the road would be full of obstacles but it was the near loss of their leader that really drove the possible dangers home.

This fact alone caused him great concern. He still had much to repent for his past crimes and he saw this as a way to repay that debt. He also viewed it as a chance to repay Sanzo as well for advocating his release with the Sanbutsushin. But it wasn't just his penitence that he worried about. He had grown fond of his new friends, especially the man who saved him from the mouth of hell. Not so long ago they had confessed a deeper feeling than friendship and soon found themselves in a new relationship. It was hard to deal with at first. Hakkai wasn't sure he was ready to deal with those emotions again. And Gojyo had sought love from any thing in a skirt, to reduce himself to one constant companion, he needed to learn how to cope.

Of the pair, it was Gojyo who adjusted first. He realized that he had not found a sense of completion before he met the green-eyed youkai when seeing someone. But now he felt contented knowing that they cared deeply for each other. Hakkai, on the other hand, was still trying to come to terms with their relationship. Not that he didn't love the half-breed, but for so many reasons. He felt like he was betraying Kanan's memory. The guilt of two taboo relationships strained his beliefs. Trying to keep a past now dead buried so that he can cultivate a new future. Uncertain how others would perceive their relationship and saving his companion any pain and embarrassment. He didn't care what others may have thought of himself or the consequences that may incur, however he was fiercely protective of those he deemed friends.

Almost losing Sanzo scared him. And when Gojyo faced off against an enraged Goku, his heart skipped a number of beats. On top of all that he panicked when the Merciful Goddess kissed and drained the kappa of life's liquid. Each event troubled him more and more reaching a point where he began to question himself. He had come to a decision to do everything in his power to care for his companions no matter the cost to himself. He would push himself to his limits and beyond if necessary.

They were all precious to him, all gave him new reasons to live and to lose any one of them would break his heart beyond mending. It was this love, this worry, this devotion that caused his hand to reach out and brush away crimson bangs. Before he realized what was happening, fingers caressed the soft skin beneath. In the next moment he heard the deep intake of breath as the slumbering figure stirred. Deep red eyes fluttered open to see what had roused him. Giving a half smile, Gojyo said 'hey' while he stretched away the sleepiness. Glancing over at the window he muttered, "How long've I been out?"

For his part, Hakkai withdrew his hand and smiled down at his companion. "Most of the morning. I thought you might be hungry." He nodded toward the table where a small meal waited.

Relaxing back in the surprisingly comfy bed, Gojyo draped one arm over his eyes. In a subdued tone, he asked, "How's the monk?"

Hakkai's smile faltered. "Recovering still. He has not spoken although I believe he did regain consciousness for a while. I was about to go check on him again when I finished here."

Something in his friend's voice caused his brow to furrow. Lifting his arm from his eyes, Gojyo glanced up at the smiling features and recognized the tired look in dulled emerald orbs. Carefully, he pushed himself up.

"I don't think you should be sitting up yet," Hakkai warned, but Gojyo ignored him despite the quick bout of dizziness.

Taking a deep breath to regain his equilibrium, the half-breed asked, "And what about you?"

"Me?" He asked innocently. "You shouldn't worry abou....."

"Don't tell me who to worry about." Gojyo abruptly interrupted. "Now, how are _you_ doing?"

"I'm fine, honestly." Hakkai tried to reassure his friend. By the look on the other's face, he wasn't buying it.

"Don't give me that. I know you. You're lucky you didn't pass out before." Of course the crimson haired man was referring to Hakkai's hasty healing technique. The first time the man used his Qi Gong skills to heal he had over done it and fell unconscious right after. Since then he had been working to moderate his energy expulsion. Still, extended use drained the man and left him very tired. Gojyo continued, "By the looks of you, I'd say you haven't slept yet. Have you at least eaten?"

Somewhat embarrassed at being read so easily, he looked away toward the table. "I had a bite before. Now, let me bring your lunch over..." Taking a step forward, he was immediately stopped by a gentle but firm hand holding his wrist. Hakkai looked down at the hand and slowly followed it up to meet the ruby gems that were fixed on him. "Gojyo?"

"Sit down Hakkai," he demanded as he let go of the thin wrist and patted a spot next to him on the bed. Reluctantly, the verdant eyed man sat on the edge of the bed, waiting. Gojyo gingerly positioned the youkai and when he finished, he gently pulled the man back to him so that he could rest his chin on top the soft brunette locks. Wrapping his arms around the other, Gojyo contented himself for the moment.

Hakkai leaned back stiffly against his friend, feeling a bit awkward and uncertain. But soon he began to relax into the embrace. The steady beat of Gojyo's heart echoed in his chest until they almost merged into one. The rhythmic inhale and exhale of breath virtually rocked him back and forth soothingly. The fatigue that he had been holding at bay until now suddenly returned with a vengeance. Against his will, he felt the heaviness of his eyelids and the deeper, longer breaths. Held within loving arms, he felt safe and above all happy. A real smile graced his features as darkness continued to beckon him. He was just about to give in when he heard the rough baritone rumble inside the chest behind him.

"How's the monkey?"

Rousing himself again, Hakkai answered, "He's fine. I was able to get him to eat after a brief chat. He was very worried."

"I can't imagine the little brat not begging for food for any reason."

"It appears that when Goku said that Sanzo was his sun, he wasn't joking. I, for one, am glad his sun didn't burn out for good."

"Yeah, I don't think he would have been able to handle that. And our little trip would have ended pretty quick." Gojyo paused for a moment before adding, "Of course, then I would have your full attention back."

Hakkai chuckled lightly at the comment. "Only you, Gojyo, would think that. You should know by now that you always have my attention."

"Except when it rains," whispered the kappa. The air around them felt suddenly cold. Tightening his hold on the man he found so long ago, he asked, "Why didn't you tell me you couldn't sleep last night. I didn't even realize you were gone until I heard that girl scream."

Reaching up to hold the arms encircling him, Hakkai frowned. "I didn't want to concern you. And I was only gone a few moments. I heard Sanzo wake in the next room minutes before the demon attacked. Since I was up, I figured I should go check on him."

Gojyo nodded his understanding then quietly inquired, "Does the rain still give you nightmares?"

"Sometimes," the human-turned-youkai answered.

"And your old wound? Does that still bother you?"

"Not so much as it had at first, but when I think about that time, there is a phantom ache." Hakkai took a deep breath then let it out in a long sigh. "Would you like to eat now?"

"Naw, I'll worry about that in a few minutes. Right now I want to stay like this."

Smiling, the brunette said, "I should really go check on Sanzo. If he is awake, I have a bad feeling that he may do something irrational."

"He's a big boy, and you can check on him later. You haven't slept in about 20 hours or so, so just relax for a few minutes with me." Gojyo's gentle urgings appealed to the sleep that beckoned the youkai. Hakkai let out another sigh, closed his eyes and melted into the warmth surrounding him. Within minutes, Gojyo felt the weight shift as Hakkai fell into a deep slumber. Verifying his assumption, he spoke his companion's name aloud and received no response. A knowing smirk curled his lips. "I knew you needed some rest," he muttered to no one in particular. He stayed there for another few minutes before finding the courage to wiggle free. Carefully, he laid Hakkai down and pulled the blanket up.

Brushing the silken bangs back, he stared down at the smooth features. His smile broadened, "Why don't you let me handle the other two for a while." Lingering for a moment longer, Gojyo finally turned and collected the tray on the table. Instead of sitting down to eat, he took the tray and headed out of the room. Walking over to another door he slowly opened it and looked inside. He noticed the blonde head peeking out from under the blankets and nodded his satisfaction. The monk was still resting for the moment.

A timid voice startled him from behind, "Gojyo? Is everything all right?"

Shutting the door and spinning around, Gojyo scowled, "Stupid monkey, you scared me half to death. Warn me next time that you're there. I almost spilled my lunch." At Goku's frown, Gojyo closed his eyes and took a deep breath to let go of his anger. Revealing bright ruby orbs again he said in a calmer voice, "The monk's still sleeping if that's what you want to know."

"Where's Hakkai?"

"I managed to get him to sleep too. He needed to take a break, he fusses too much over us."

"Yeah, but I think it's nice. Don't you?"

"Of course I do, but I'm not about to tell him that. He'd work himself into the ground if he knew we liked his fussing, so don't you go telling him," the half-breed warned. Fully comprehending what the older man said, Goku smiled and nodded. Taking that for what it was, Gojyo decided he needed to keep the monkey busy so that he didn't worry so much. "Now brat, go out and get me some cigarettes, I'm out and I really want to smoke."

"Aww, why do I have to go and get them?"

"Because monkey, I'm not up to my full strength yet and both Sanzo and Hakkai are sleeping, so that leaves you."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, water-sprite." Goku mumbled as he turned to do his bidding.

Gojyo called after him, "And grab some snacks while you're out. I don't know if the kitchen will be open for dinner." At the mention of food, the younger man perked.

"Sure!" He yelled back as he bounded away.

The crimson-haired man watched his fellow journeyman run off. Leaning against the door, he decided it would be best to eat outside the monk's room rather than in it. The blonde was often cranky when he woke up and waking up with a nasty wound would only sour his attitude further. Slowly sliding down the length of the wall, Gojyo sat just past the door and ate, waiting.

-owari-

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I hope you liked. Please remember to review if you have a moment. I would really like to know what you thought!!! :D Domo!


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